Five Christian dating question you should ask
The question of dating can sometimes be challenging to deal with, especially for those people who are just starting. It gets especially trickier where Christian dating is concerned. Asking the right questions gives you the chance to know your potential mate. It allows you to understand whether your potential partner is firm in the knowledge of God or has their desire built on knowing God. This way, you set the right foundation, a Godly foundation for your future potential relationship, that will move towards bringing both of you closer to God. Christian dating does not require you to set aside who you are, instead, it is about living your day-to-day life such that it is per Christian doctrines. Who you are as a Christian should reflect in your relationship and dating as a whole. In this article, we take you the important questions you should ask before dating your potential spouse to ascertain that both of you will walk the same journey; after all, two cannot walk together unless they agree (Amos 3:3)
1. Are you a Christian?
Ask your date or person of interest what denomination they belong to and whether they have always belonged to that denomination. Knowing this about them will help you understand the doctrine they believe in and follow and whether there is anything, in particular, you identify with about their denomination. You and your date of interest must identify with the same principles, as these will guide your relationship. Having and following the same doctrines, or more specifically, belonging to the same denomination will help you avoid conflicts that arise because of inconsistency in ideas. Keep in mind that the goal of Christian dating is to engage in a relationship that reflects Christ in every aspect and manner; whether is speech, thought, or action. This question will help you understand where the other person is in terms of the level of faith. Additionally, it will help you gauge compatibility between the two of you.
2. Church going tendency
Where two or more are gathered in God’s name, He will be in their midst (Matthew 18:20). The Bible emphasizes the importance of fellowship with other believers. It is therefore imperative that you know whether your date goes to church. Moreover, what Church they go to and the motive behind their going to church can help you understand them more. It does not end there; how regularly they attend church can help you determine their level of devotion to matters about God and Christianity. If you are the kind of person who only goes to church seasonally, it may become tough to date a person who goes to church four times a week and vice versa. Dig deeper and ask about the importance of their faith in their life and what they do to grow this faith. Inquire whether they are involved in other matters of the church besides going to service. This way, you will be able to know their level of understanding of Christ and what this personal relationship with Christ means to them.
3. Previous relationships
This question can sometimes be a touchy subject, so tread carefully with this one. However, it is of great importance that you understand briefly the history of your date’s relationship: what moved their relationship? Was it a Christian-based relationship? Have you previously dated non-religious people? Did they work out? What challenges were there, and how did you work to resolve them? Finally, what is their view on non-Christian relationships?
4. Premarital intimacy
Intimacy can mean different things to different people. Understand what their concept of intimacy is and their definition of premarital intimacy. The Christian circle believes that sex outside marriage is a sin and it is one of the clearest, unquestionable prohibitions in Christianity. As a holy mystery, sex is a powerful bonding agent that shapes and affects the relationship between a man and woman as nothing else can. Getting their view on this kind of intimacy, therefore, will do away with many issues that usually crop up later on in relationships. Being on the same page regarding what intimacy is on the backdrop of a Christian background will help you understand where the both of you stand without bringing conflict in the future.
5. What is your view on Christian Dating?
Sometimes, it may turn out to be difficult when a seasoned Christian who is much ahead in their faith starts dating another Christian who is only new to Christianity. While it is not impossible, it is not exactly easy for this to grow into something meaningful. As such, knowing what your date understands by Christian dating will help you know whether you can get along just fine or you need to make further reconsiderations. Christian dating follows particular guidelines that each of you must adhere to if you want to succeed in your journey of faith. Given this, both of you must be ready to commit under the Christian doctrines with the full understanding that this will ultimately help you walk in God’s will as He intended it to be.
Takeaway:
The above list is not exhaustive, but enough to guide you and help you understand your potential partner better. Ensure that you bring up these questions naturally without forcing them, especially the pretty heavy ones. Ideally, the goal of these questions is to inform them of who you are as a person and the importance of your faith, not just in your life but also in the life of the person you are looking to spend your life with that both of you must share the same value with the ultimate goal of pleasing God in your day-to-day living. Finally, keep in mind that God can turn unlikely situations through mysterious happenings but you must be aware of who you are in God and how you want to live your life with your partner in Christ. This way, you will be able to deal with matters of life wholesomely, together, and with God’s guidance in accordance with His word.
